Our Sick Game 2012

Paterno Insured, Paterno Dies

2012-01-22T07:35:00.001-08:00

Some excitement in Our Sick Game as last night Sweet Valley Death took out insurance on Joe Paterno, 85. Just hours later, Paterno died in the hospital, thus ensuring a successful insurance claim. As a result, SVD and Ewing Oil will split Paterno's 15 points. SVD now leads the game 61.5 to 7.5.

SVD Strikes First

2012-01-20T15:23:00.001-08:00

Sweet Valley Death struck first in the new season today with the death of their top overall pick in the 2012 draft, singer Etta James (73). Given her moneyball status, SVD has jumped out to an early 54-0 lead over Ewing Oil.

The 2011 MVP Is...

2012-01-14T14:21:00.000-08:00

Amy Winehouse has been named Most Valuable Player of the 2011 season for her 83-point death (10+ bonus for hat trick). Her score gave Ewing Oil a 246-64 lead over Sweet Valley Death at the end of July. Winehouse joins a prestigious list of Most Valuable Player's in the history of Our Sick Game:

2005: Peter Jennings
2006: Fidel Castro (not-deceased)
2007: Anna Nicole Smith
2008: Tony Snow
2009: Michael Jackson/Farrah Fawcett (co MVP's)
2010: Richard Hayward
2011: Amy Winehouse

All-Time Our Sick Game Season Results

2012-01-02T07:47:00.000-08:00

A recap of seasons in the history of Our Sick Game:

2005: Ewing Oil d. Sweet Valley Death, 82-57
2006: Sweet Valley Death d. Ewing Oil, 151-142.5
2007: Sweet Valley Death d. Ewing Oil, 260-144
2008: Sweet Valley Death d. Ewing Oil, 244-126
2009: Ewing Oil d. Sweet Valley Death, 376-244.5
2010: Ewing Oil d. Sweet Valley Death, 208-166
2011: Ewing Oil d. Sweet Valley Death, 378-157

Ewing Oil, 2011 Champion

2012-01-01T18:03:00.000-08:00

Congratulations to the winner of Our Sick Game 2011, Ewing Oil, 378-157 victors over Sweet Valley Death. This is the 3rd consecutive championship for Ewing Oil, and their 4th overall (2005, 2009, 2010, 2011). Ewing Oil holds a 4-3 edge all-time versus Sweet Valley Death.

As champion of Our Sick Game, Ewing Oil has earned another year with the Johnny Carson Cup, the most hallowed and cherished trophy in the world. In addition, Ewing Oil's prize will be a $50 gift card to Best Buy.

Don't Forget the Moneyballs

2011-12-31T15:17:00.000-08:00

The start of the 2012 season of Our Sick Game can only mean one thing: the long-awaited announcement of Moneyball selections.

Sweet Valley Death has selected Etta James (73) as their Moneyball for 2012. James earn SVD 54 points upon her death. For their Moneyball selection, Ewing Oil has chosen their 2011 4th of July pick, Gary Carter (57). His death would earn Ewing Oil 86 big points.

Good luck to Sweet Valley Death, Etta James, Ewing Oil, and Gary Carter in the upcoming season.

Sweet Valley Death Draft Results

2011-12-30T16:05:00.000-08:00

With the first overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected singer Etta James. Here are the rest of Sweet Valley Death's 2012 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Conrad Bain, 88 (36)
Jason Becker, 42 (29)
Jim Brown, 75 (17)
Richard Chamberlain, 77 (26)
Tommy Chong, 73 (37)
David Crosby, 70 (5)
Ann B. Davis, 85 (31)
Joyce DeWitt, 62 (9)
Ted DiBiase, 57 (22)
Bob Dole, 88 (27)
Corey Feldman, 40 (18)
James Garner, 83 (24)
Billy Graham, 93 (20)
Gene Hackman, 81 (13)
Whitney Houston, 48 (14)
Joe Jackson, 82 (19)
Etta James, 73 (1)
Lisa Lampenelli, 50 (10)
Dina Lohan, 49 (11)
Penny Marshall, 69 (7)
Heidi Montag, 25 (30)
Tracy Morgan, 43 (32)
Connie Needham, 52 (25)
Laraine Newman, 59 (38)
Chuck Noll, 79 (35)
Nick Nolte, 70 (8)
Gene Okerlund, 69 (21)
Ross Perot, 81 (34)
William Perry, 49 (3)
Prince Phillip, 90 (6)
Sidney Poitier, 84 (28)
Nicole Polizzi, 24 (15)
Chris Pratt, 32 (12)
Randy Quaid, 61 (2)
Samantha Ronson, 34 (4)
Jimmy Snuka, 68 (23)
Roderick Toombs, 57 (16)
Steven Tyler, 63 (33)

Ewing Oil Draft Results

2011-12-30T15:48:00.000-08:00

With the second overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected former Egyptian president Hosni Mubarak . Here are the rest of Ewing Oil's 2012 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Bashar Al-Assad, 46 (3)
Paul Allen, 58 (9)
Pamela Anderson, 44 (36)
Maya Angelou, 83 (31)
Casey Anthony, 24 (5)
Julian Assange, 40 (21)
Yogi Berra, 86 (28)
Gary Busey, 67 (23)
Glenn Campbell, 75 (6)
Hugo Chavez, 57 (12)
Bill Clinton, 65 (25)
Richard Dawson, 79 (30)
Charles Durning, 88 (13)
Wayne Flemming, 61 (15)
Stefani Germanotta, 25 (11)
Robin Gibb, 62 (2)
Bobby Heenan, 67 (20)
George Kennedy, 86 (37)
B.B. King, 86 (22)
Jerry Lewis, 85 (29)
Michael Lohan, 51 (10)
Jon Lord, 70 (19)
Bernie Madoff, 73 (7)
George Michael, 48 (17)
Art Modell, 86 (18)
Walter Mondale, 83 (24)
Hosni Mubarak, 83 (1)
Rupert Murdoch, 80 (8)
Willie Nelson, 78 (33)
Bob Newhart, 82 (38)
Wayne Newton, 69 (35)
Ferdie Pacheco, 84 (27)
Vin Scully, 84 (26)
O.J. Simpson, 64 (32)
Robert Wagner, 81 (14)
Andy Williams, 84 (4)
Burt Young, 71 (34)
Ethan Zohn, 38 (16)

Don't Forget the Keepers...

2011-12-30T15:38:00.000-08:00

Rounding out the lineup for Ewing Oil and Sweet Valley Death are 10 keepers from the 2011 rosters.

Ewing Oil:

Kareem Abdul-Jabar, 64
Abdelbaset Ali Mohamed Al Megrahi, 59
Gary Carter, 58
Gay Culverhouse, 64
George Karl, 61
Artie Lange, 44
Loretta Lynn, 77
Brett Michaels, 49
Buddy Ryan, 77
Joran Van Der Sloot, 24

Sweet Valley Death:

John Daly, 45
Pete Doherty, 32
Michael Douglas, 67
Louis Farrakhan, 78
Ismail Haniya, 60
Hulk Hogan, 59
Mary Kate Olsen, 25
Evi Quaid, 48
Dwayne Schintzius, 43
Orlando Thomas, 39

Don't Forget the Grandfathers

2011-12-30T12:38:00.000-08:00

Ewing Oil:

Muhammad Ali, 69
Neil Armstrong, 81
F. Lee Bailey, 78
Bob Barker, 88
Ray Bradbury, 91
Mel Brooks, 85
Bobby Brown, 42
Barbara Bush, 86
Jimmy Carter, 86
Rosalyn Carter, 85
Dick Cheney, 70
Bill Cosby, 74
Andy Dick, 46
Conrad Dobler, 61
Pete Dominici, 79
Clint Eastwood, 80
Roger Ebert, 69
Luis Echeverria, 89
Annette Funicello, 69
Malcolm Glazer, 83
Merle Haggard, 74
Larry Hagman, 80
Scott Hall, 53
Hugh Hefner, 85
Hal Holbrook, 86
Terry Jones, 69
Ken Kercheval, 76
Henry Kissinger, 88
Martin Landau, 83
Angela Lansbury, 86
Phil Lesh, 71
Jerry Lee Lewis, 76
Lindsay Lohan, 25
Courtney Love, 47
Nelson Mandella, 93
Don Pardo, 93
Joe Paterno, 85
Bum Phillips, 88
Pope Benedict XVI, 84
Charlotte Rae, 85
Nancy Reagan, 90
Keith Richards, 68
Nicole Richie, 30
Bill Russell, 77
Ariel Sharon, 83
Britney Spears, 30
Phil Spector, 72
Harry Dean Stanton, 85
Helen Thomas, 91
Mike Tyson, 45
Eli Wallach, 96
Paul Zimmerman, 79

Sweet Valley Death:

Iyad Allawi, 66
Louis Anderson, 58
Kurt Angle, 43
Ed Asner, 82
Chuck Bednarik, 86
Chuck Berry, 85
Ronnie Biggs, 82
Bobby Bowden, 82
Wilford Brimley, 77
George H.W. Bush, 87
Earl Campbell, 56
Fidel Castro, 85
Dick Clark, 82
Beverly Cleary, 95
Sean Connery, 81
Richard Dawson, 79
Ruby Dee, 87
Blake Fielder-Civil, 29
Michael J. Fox, 50
Aretha Franklin, 69
Frank Gifford, 81
Mikhail Gorbachev, 80
Andy Griffith, 85
David Hasselhoff, 59
Stephen Hawking, 69
Keith Jackson, 83
Alex Karras, 76
Christopher Lee, 89
George McGovern, 89
Mindy McReady, 36
Liza Minelli, 65
Roger Moore, 84
Stan Musial, 91
Leonard Nimoy, 80
Arnold Palmer, 82
Frederick Pohl, 92
Queen Elizabeth II, 85
Carl Reiner, 89
Don Rickles, 85
Mickey Rooney, 91
Pat Summerall, 81
Donald Sutherland, 76
Margaret Thatcher, 86
Vern Troyer, 42
Dick Van Patten, 83
Jack Vance, 95
Abe Vigoda, 90
Scott Weiland, 44
Betty White, 89
Gene Wilder, 78
Jonathan Winters, 86
Chuck Yeager, 88

Scoring Correction

2011-12-17T12:07:00.000-08:00

It was incorrectly reported in April that Sydney Lumet died while on Ewing Oil's team. Lumet belongs to Sweet Valley Death and therefore deserves his 14 points. This makes the revised score 378-157 in favor of Ewing Oil.

Ewing Oil Loses Number 1 Pick

2011-12-16T07:46:00.000-08:00

2011 top draft pick for Ewing Oil, 62-year old moneyball Christopher Hitchens, has died. His 76 points adds to Ewing Oil's lead, making the score 392-143 with just a few weeks remaining in the season.

At the end of November...

2011-12-16T07:45:00.001-08:00

With one month remaining in the game, Ewing Oil leads Sweet Valley Death by a score of 316-143.

Ewing Oil:
March -- Elizabeth Taylor, 21
April -- Sydney Lumet, 14
May -- Ron Springs, 46, Jeff Conaway, 40
June -- Jack Kevorkian, 17, Tom McEwen, 12
July -- Betty Ford, 7, Sherwood Schwartz, 6, Amy Winehouse, 73 (+10)
September -- Mike Heimerdinger, 42
October -- Al Davis, 18
November -- Andy Rooney, 8

Sweet Valley Death:
May -- Seve Ballesteros, 47
June -- Peter Falk, 17
August -- Bubba Smith, 34
October -- Steve Jobs, 45

Did You Ever Notice Andy Rooney is Dead?

2011-11-06T15:36:00.000-08:00

Curmudgeon/national treasure Andy Rooney has died at the age of 92, leaving 8 points for Ewing Oil as his lasting contribution to humanity. Ewing Oil now leads S.V.D by a score of 316-143.

At the End of October...

2011-11-01T15:35:00.000-07:00

Ten have passed, and Ewing Oil leads Sweet Valley Death by a score of 308-143.

Ewing Oil:
March -- Elizabeth Taylor, 21
April -- Sydney Lumet, 14
May -- Ron Springs, 46, Jeff Conaway, 40
June -- Jack Kevorkian, 17, Tom McEwen, 12
July -- Betty Ford, 7, Sherwood Schwartz, 6, Amy Winehouse, 73 (+10)
September -- Mike Heimerdinger, 42
October -- Al Davis, 18

Sweet Valley Death:
May -- Seve Ballesteros, 47
June -- Peter Falk, 17
August -- Bubba Smith, 34
October -- Steve Jobs, 45

Just Dead, Baby

2011-10-08T15:33:00.000-07:00

Al Davis (82) has died, giving Ewing Oil an additional 18 points. Ewing Oil now leads the game 308-143.

SVD Strikes Again

2011-10-05T16:45:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death has added another big score today with the death of Steve Jobs, 55. His 45 points has cut the Ewing Oil lead to 288-143.

At the end of September...

2011-10-05T16:41:00.000-07:00

Nine months have passed, and Ewing Oil leads Sweet Valley Death by a score of 288-98

Ewing Oil:
March -- Elizabeth Taylor, 21
April -- Sydney Lumet, 14
May -- Ron Springs, 46, Jeff Conaway, 40
June -- Jack Kevorkian, 17, Tom McEwen, 12
July -- Betty Ford, 7, Sherwood Schwartz, 6, Amy Winehouse, 73 (+10)
September -- Mike Heimerdinger, 42

Sweet Valley Death:
May -- Seve Ballesteros, 47
June -- Peter Falk, 17
August -- Bubba Smith, 34

No Survivors in 2011

2011-08-06T12:31:00.000-07:00

With the deaths this year of Amy Winehouse and Bubba Smith, both Ewing Oil and Sweet Valley Death have lost one player each from their Survivor Series rosters. Therefore, neither team will be awarded 15 bonus points at the end of the season.

SVD Back on the Board

2011-08-05T06:19:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death got back on the board this week with the death of "Police Academy" actor Bubba Smith, 66. His 34 points now narrows the score to 246-98.

Hat-Trick for Ewing Oil

2011-07-23T13:30:00.000-07:00

The death today of Amy Winehouse, 27, not only gives Ewing Oil 73 points, but an additional 10 points for their third death in the month of July (Sherwood Schwartz, Betty Ford). Ewing Oil now leads Sweet Valley Death by a score of 246-64.

Ford, Schwartz Bite the Dust

2011-07-12T16:29:00.001-07:00

Ewing Oil has scored a combined 13 points this week following the deaths of Betty Ford, 93, and Sherwood Schwartz, 94, both off their grandfathered list. Their deaths give Ewing Oil a 163-64 lead, and they are 2/3 of the way towards a hat trick for the month of July.

4th of July Supplemental Draft

2011-07-06T19:06:00.001-07:00

With their picks in the 4th of July Supplemental Draft, Sweet Valley Death used their pick to select Casey Anthony, 25. Ewing Oil selected Gary Carter, 57.

At the end of June...

2011-07-03T09:18:00.000-07:00

Half the season has passed, and Ewing Oil leads Sweet Valley Death by a score of 150-64.

Ewing Oil:
March -- Elizabeth Taylor, 21
April -- Sydney Lumet, 14
May -- Ron Springs, 46, Jeff Conaway, 40
June -- Jack Kevorkian, 17, Tom McEwen, 12

Sweet Valley Death:
May -- Seve Ballesteros, 47
June -- Peter Falk, 17

Lots of Death Going On

2011-06-24T15:58:00.000-07:00

June has seen a recent rash of deaths. First, Ewing Oil extended their lead with the deaths of Jack Kevorkian (83) and Tom McEwen (88) for a combined 29 points. Sweet Valley Death got back on the board with the death of Peter Falk (83) for 17 points. This makes the score 150-64.

Jeff Conaway Dead

2011-05-30T10:17:00.001-07:00

Ewing Oil has picked up 40 more points following the recent death of actor Jeff Conaway, 60. His 40 points now gives Ewing Oil a 121-47 lead.

Deaths to Report

2011-05-21T08:49:00.000-07:00

This month has seen two major deaths, one for Sweet Valley Death and Ewing Oil. Earlier this month, golfer Seve Ballesteros died at the age of 53 (47 points) for SVD. Then, Ewing Oil responded with the death of former Cowboy Ron Springs, who was 54 (46 points). This currently leaves the score at 81-47 in favor of Ewing Oil.

The Verdict: Sidney Lumet Gone for Ewing Oil

2011-04-15T05:56:00.001-07:00

Sidney Lumet became the 2nd casualty of the season for Ewing Oil when he passed away on April 9 at the age of 86. His 14 points give Ewing Oil a five-touchdown lead, 35-0.

Liz Taylor Leads It Off for Ewing Oil

2011-03-23T14:05:00.000-07:00

Nearly three full months into the 2011 season of Our Sick Game, there is finally a score to report. Today Ewing Oil earned 21 points following the death of screen legend Elizabeth Taylor (79). This gives the defending champs a 21-0 lead with just over 9 months left in the game.

The 2010 MVP Is...

2011-01-14T14:16:00.000-08:00

Richard Hayward has been named Most Valuable Player for 2010 for his 64-point contribution to Ewing Oil. The 4th pick of the 2010 draft, Hayward's death put Ewing Oil ahead of Sweet Valley Death by three points with under a month left in the game.

Ewing Oil, 2010 Champion

2011-01-01T00:00:00.000-08:00

Congratulations to the winner of Our Sick Game 2010, Ewing Oil, 208-166 victors over Sweet Valley Death. This is the 2nd consecutive championship for Ewing Oil, and their 3rd overall (2005, 2009, 2010).

As champion of Our Sick Game, Ewing Oil has earned another year with the Johnny Carson Cup, the most hallowed and cherished trophy in the world. In addition, Ewing Oil's prize will be a $50 gift card to Best Buy.

Don't Forget the Moneyballs

2010-12-31T15:16:00.000-08:00

The start of the 2011 season of Our Sick Game can only mean one thing: the long-awaited announcement of Moneyball selections.

Sweet Valley Death has selected Michael Douglas (66) as their Moneyball for 2011. M-Doug would earn SVD a tidy 68 points upon his death. For their Moneyball selection, Ewing Oil has chosen their first pick of the draft, author Christopher Hitchens (61). His death would earn Ewing Oil 78 big points.

Good luck to Sweet Valley Death, Michael Douglas, Ewing Oil, and Christopher Hitchens in the upcoming season.

Survivor Series 2011 Picks

2010-12-31T12:27:00.000-08:00

A huge fan favorite of Our Sick Game is the Survivor Series. Each team selects 15 players from the other team's roster who they believe will not die in 2011. If each of the selected players remains alive at the end of 1, 15 points will be awarded to the lucky team. No partial credit will be awarded. Mediocrity is frowned upon, not rewarded, here at Our Sick Game.

Ewing Oil:

Kurt Angle
Earl Campbell
Grizz Chapman
Tommy Chong
John Daly
Michael J. Fox
Jon Gosselin
Alexa Ray Joel
Hulk Hogan
Alex Karras
Jason Mewes
Urban Meyer
Snooki Polizzi
Bubba Smith
Steven Tyler

Sweet Valley Death:

Paul Abdul
Pam Anderson
Julian Assange
Bobby Brown
Bill Clinton
Corey Felldman
Lady Gaga
Kate Gosselin
Lindsay Lohan
Courtney Love
Heidi Montag
Nicole Richie
Britney Spears
Mike Tyson
Amy Winehouse

Don't Forget the Keepers

2010-12-29T06:43:00.000-08:00

Rounding out the lineup for Ewing Oil and Sweet Valley Death are 10 keepers from the 2010 rosters.

Ewing Oil:

Kareem Abdul-Jabar, 63
Gay Culverhouse, 63
Annette Funicello, 68
Scott Hall, 52
Artie Lange, 43
Courtney Love, 46
Loretta Lynn, 76
Brett Michaels, 48
Mike Tyson, 44
Amy Winehouse, 27

Sweet Valley Death:

Kurt Angle, 42
Earl Campbell, 55
Raul Castro, 79
Grizz Chapman, 36
Peter Falk, 83
Aretha Franklin, 68
Steve Jobs, 55
Mindy McReady, 35
Tracy Morgan, 42
O.J. Simpson, 63

Don't Forget the Grandfathers

2010-12-28T19:19:00.000-08:00

These players have been with the same team for at least three consecutive years, which is the criteria in this game for being "grandfathered," or staying with the same team until death.

Ewing Oil:

Muhammad Ali, 68
Neil Armstrong, 80
Bob Barker, 87
Ray Bradbury, 90
Barbara Bush, 85
Rosalyn Carter, 84
Dick Cheney, 69
Andy Dick, 45
Conrad Dobler, 60
Roger Ebert, 68
Luis Echeverria, 88
Betty Ford, 92
Malcolm Glazer, 82
Larry Hagman, 79
Hugh Hefner, 84
Hal Holbrook, 85
Terry Jones, 68
Ken Kercheval, 75
Jack Kevorkian, 82
Henry Kissinger, 87
Martin Landau, 82
Phil Lesh, 70
Lindsay Lohan, 24
Nelson Mandella, 92
Tom McEwen, 87
Don Pardo, 92
Joe Paterno, 84
Bum Phillips, 87
Pope Benedict XVI, 83
Nancy Reagan, 89
Keith Richards, 67
Nicole Richie, 29
Andy Rooney, 91
Sherwood Schwartz, 94
Ariel Sharon, 82
Britney Spears, 29
Phil Spector, 71
Ron Springs, 54
Harry Dean Stanton, 84
Elizabeth Taylor, 78
Helen Thomas, 90
Eli Wallach, 95

Sweet Valley Death:

Iyad Allawi, 65
Louis Anderson, 57
Ed Asner, 81
Chuck Bednarik, 85
Chuck Berry, 84
Ronnie Biggs, 81
Bobby Bowden, 81
Wilford Brimley, 76
George H.W. Bush, 86
Fidel Castro, 84
Dick Clark, 81
Beverly Cleary, 94
Ruby Dee, 86
Michael J. Fox, 49
Frank Gifford, 80
Mikhail Gorbachev, 79
Andy Griffith, 84
David Hasselhoff, 58
Stephen Hawking, 68
Liza Minelli, 64
Roger Moore, 83
Stan Musial, 90
Leonard Nimoy, 79
Arnold Palmer, 81
Queen Elizabeth II, 84
Carl Reiner, 88
Don Rickles, 84
Mickey Rooney, 90
Pat Summerall, 80
Margaret Thatcher, 85
Vern Troyer, 41
Abe Vigoda, 89
Scott Weiland, 43
Betty White, 88
Gene Wilder, 77
Jonathan Winters, 85
Chuck Yeager, 87

Ewing Oil Draft Results

2010-12-28T19:16:00.000-08:00

With the second overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected author Christopher Hitchens. Here are the rest of Ewing Oil's 2011 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Abdelbaset Ali Mohamed Al Megrahi, 58 (31)
Paul Abdul, 48 (63)
Buzz Aldrin, 80 (15)
Paul Allen, 57 (18)
Pamela Anderson, 43 (33)
Maya Angelou, 82 (7)
Adam Ant, 56 (4)
Julian Assange, 39 (13)
Lauren Bacall, 86 (55)
F. Lee Bailey, 77 (56)
Conrad Bain, 87 (48)
Yogi Berra, 85 (22)
Rudy Boesch, 82 (71)
Pat Boone, 76 (8)
Ernest Borgnine, 93 (59)
Mel Brooks, 84 (30)
Bobby Brown, 41 (57)
Sid Caesar, 88 (70)
Jimmy Carter, 86 (46)
Richard Chamberlain, 76 (25)
Bill Clinton, 64 (47)
Jeff Conaway, 60 (27)
Bill Cosby, 73 (36)
David Crosby, 69 (17)
Al Davis, 81 (28)
Donna D'Errico, 42 (68)
Phyllis Diller, 93 (64)
Bob Dole, 87 (32)
Pete Domenici, 78 (34)
Kirk Douglas, 94 (50)
Hugh Downs, 89 (51)
Charles Durning, 87 (16)
Clint Eastwood, 80 (37)
Corey Feldman, 39 (14)
Zsa Zsa Gabor, 93 (24)
Lady Gaga, 24 (6)
Kate Gosselin, 35 (49)
Billy Graham, 92 (35)
Camille Grammer, 47 (12)
Kelsey Grammer, 55 (29)
Merle Haggard, 73 (38)
Mike Heimerdinger, 58 (3)
Buck Henry, 80 (72)
Christopher Hitchens, 61 (1)
Whitney Houston, 47 (58)
Kathryn Joosten, 71 (20)
George Karl, 60 (19)
Casey Kasem, 78 (21)
George Kennedy, 85 (52)
B.B. King, 85 (23)
Angela Lansbury, 85 (45)
Cloris Leachman, 84 (5)
Stan Lee, 88 (54)
Jerry Lewis, 84 (39)
Jerry Lee Lewis, 75 (40)
Stan Mikita, 70 (69)
Art Modell, 85 (41)
Heidi Montag, 24 (10)
Bob Newhart, 81 (60)
Wayne Newton, 68 (26)
Ferdie Pacheco, 83 (61)
Ross Perot, 80 (44)
Sidney Poitier, 83 (73)
Roman Polanksi, 77 (53)
Randy Quaid, 60 (9)
Charlotte Rae, 84 (66)
Bill Russell, 76 (43)
Buddy Ryan, 76 (67)
Vin Scully, 83 (11)
Joran Van Der Sloot, 23 (2)
Mike Wallace, 92 (42)
Tex Winter, 88 (62)
Paul Zimmerman, 78 (65)

Sweet Valley Death Draft Results

2010-12-28T18:49:00.000-08:00

With the first overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected actor Michael Douglas. Here are the rest of Sweet Valley Death's 2011 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Alan Arkin, 76 (29)
David Arquette, 39 (59)
Sevi Ballesteros, 53 (30)
Jason Becker, 41 (15)
Jim Brown, 74 (57)
Gary Busey, 66 (16)
Tommy Chong, 72 (55)
Sean Connery, 80 (22)
John Daly, 44 (17)
Ann B. Davis, 84 (28)
Richard Dawson, 78 (62)
Doris Day, 88 (50)
Pete Doherty, 31 (13)
Michael Douglas, 66 (1)
Bob Dylan, 69 (38)
Louis Farrakhan, 77 (36)
Blake Fielder-Civil, 28 (18)
Teri Garr, 66 (31)
Peaches Geldof, 20 (20)
Mel Gibson, 54 (4)
Jon Gosselin, 33 (49)
Louis Gossett Jr., 74 (12)
Ismail Haniya, 59 (46)
Hulk Hogan, 58 (34)
Joe Jackson, 81 (42)
Keith Jackson, 82 (6)
Al Jaffe, 89 (63)
Alexa Ray Joel, 25 (21)
Alex Karras, 75 (45)
Stacy Keach, 69 (24)
Richard Kiel, 71 (52)
Christopher Lee, 88 (54)
Ursula K. Le Guin, 81 (25)
Sidney Lumet, 86 (53)
Bernie Madoff, 72 (2)
George McGovern, 88 (47)
Jason Mewes, 36 (19)
Urban Meyer, 46 (7)
Walter Mondale, 82 (41)
Connie Needham, 51 (14)
Willie Nelson, 77 (44)
Chuck Noll, 78 (51)
Mary Kate Olsen, 24 (11)
Prince Phillip, 89 (35)
Rowdy Roddy Piper, 56 (23)
Frederick Pohl, 91 (39)
Snooki Polizzi, 23 (48)
David Prowse , 75(60)
Evi Quaid , 47 (10)
Samantha Ronson, 33 (8)
Dwayne Schintzius, 42 (27)
Bubba Smith, 65 (33)
Stephen Stills, 65 (26)
Donald Sutherland, 75 (61)
Orlando Thomas, 38 (3)
Peter Tork, 68 (5)
Steven Tyler, 62 (9)
Dick Van Patten, 82 (58)
Jack Vance, 94 (40)
Ron Wyden, 61 (32)
Burt Young, 70 (43)
Manuel Zeyala, 58 (56)
Don Zimmer, 79 (37)

Ewing Oil Adds to Lead

2010-12-07T16:35:00.000-08:00

Ewing Oil picked up 39 critical points today following the death of Elizabeth Edwards, 61. Her points give Ewing Oil a 42-point lead with a little over three weeks left in the season, 193-151.

Scoring Updates

2010-12-03T05:52:00.000-08:00

In a big development, two deaths that have gone unreported so far are about to be added to the game. SVD agreed to waive the 90-day reporting deadline, which allows Ewing Oil to claim the death of Richard Hayward, their 4th pick in the draft. Hayward, 64, was a drummer and founding member of the band Little Feat.
SVD also gets a claim, adding the death of Tony Curtis, 85, in September.
With the addition of 36 points and 15 points respectively, the score now becomes 154-151 in favor of Ewing Oil with less than a month remaining in the game.

At the End of November...

2010-12-01T14:10:00.001-08:00

This is it! With just one month left in the season, it is coming down to the wire with SVD holding an 18-point lead over defending champion Ewing Oil, 136-118.

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32
May -- Ernie Harwell, 8
July -- George Steinbrenner, 20
November -- Pat Burns, 42, Leslie Nielsen, 16

Sweet Valley Death:
April -- John Forsythe, 8
May -- Simon Monjack, 61, Dennis Hopper, 26
June -- Rue McClanahan, 26
October -- Tom Bosley, 17

Leslie Nielsen Finally Dead

2010-11-29T06:23:00.000-08:00

Actor Leslie Nielsen, 84, died this past weekend, giving Ewing Oil another 16 points. This inches the defending champions that much closer to Sweet Valley Death, who they now trail by a score of 136-118.

Ewing Oil Back in Business

2010-11-22T11:26:00.000-08:00

Ewing Oil has added 42 points with the death of hockey coach Pat Burns, 58. That narrows the score to 136-102 with six weeks remaining in the season.

At the End of October...

2010-11-01T11:24:00.000-07:00

At the end of 10 months, Sweet Valley Death holds a 136-60 lead.

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32
May -- Ernie Harwell, 8
July -- George Steinbrenner, 20

Sweet Valley Death:
April -- John Forsythe, 8
May -- Simon Monjack, 61, Dennis Hopper, 26
June -- Rue McClanahan, 26
October -- Tom Bosley, 17

Happy Days No More for Bosley

2010-10-19T11:41:00.001-07:00

Sweet Valley Death has upped their lead to 136-60 with the death of TV icon Tom Bosley, 83. His 17 points help keep SVD in a commanding lead over 2009 champions Ewing Oil.

At the End of September...

2010-10-01T11:42:00.000-07:00

With 9 months in the book and just three more to go, Sweet Valley Death still holds a 119-60 lead over Ewing Oil.

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32
May -- Ernie Harwell, 8
July -- George Steinbrenner, 20

Sweet Valley Death:
April -- John Forsythe, 8
May -- Simon Monjack, 61, Dennis Hopper, 26
June -- Rue McClanahan, 26

Ewing Oil Loses Its Boss

2010-07-13T15:27:00.000-07:00

Ewing Oil picked up 20 (sad) points today when George M. Steinbrenner, 80, passed away after suffering a massive heart attack. The death of one of Ewing Oil's grandfathered players now leaves the score at 119-60 in favor of Sweet Valley Death.

The Picks Are In...

2010-07-04T12:54:00.000-07:00

The 4th of July Supplemental Draft has once again come and gone, and the selections this year do not appear to be particularly significant.

Ewing Oil, with the first pick, selected the 47-year-old lead singer of Poison, Brett Michaels. With their pick, Sweet Valley Death selected Denver Nuggets head coach George Karl, 59.

At the End of June...

2010-07-01T14:52:00.000-07:00

With half the season in the books, Sweet Valley Death has surged in front of Ewing Oil and taken a 119-40 lead. A recap:

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32
May -- Ernie Harwell, 8

Sweet Valley Death:
April -- John Forsythe, 8
May -- Simon Monjack, 61, Dennis Hopper, 26
June -- Rue McClanahan, 26

A Golden Death for S.V.D.

2010-06-07T15:42:00.001-07:00

Sweet Valley Death has added to a remarkable run with yet another significant death. Rue McClanahan, one of the last remaining members of the Golden Girls, has died at the age of 76. Her 24 points extend Sweet Valley Death's lead to 119-40.

At the End of May...

2010-06-01T15:40:00.000-07:00

With five months in the books, Sweet Valley Death has surged in front of Ewing Oil and taken a 95-40 lead. A recap:

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32
May -- Ernie Harwell, 8

Sweet Valley Death:
April -- John Forsythe, 8
May -- Simon Monjack, 61, Dennis Hopper, 26

Dennis Hopper Chips in for S.V.D.

2010-05-30T06:15:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death has awoken. The once sleeping giant has reeled off two major deaths in a row. First, Simon Monjack, and now 74-year-old Dennis Hopper. His death, worth 26 points, has extended their lead over 2009 champion Ewing Oil to 95-40.

S.V.D. Makes Huge Statement with Monjack

2010-05-24T15:16:00.000-07:00

Today's death of Simon Monjack -- best known as the late actress Brittany Murphy's weird British husband -- marks the first major death of the 2010 season. The 39-year-old has propelled Sweet Valley Death into the lead with 61 huge points. S.V.D. now has a 69-40 lead over Ewing Oil.

Ewing Oil Goes Yard

2010-05-05T17:47:00.001-07:00

Responding to the recent death of SVD's John Forsythe, 92, Ewing Oil has answered with a death of one of their own 92-year-olds, former Detroit Tigers radio announcer Ernie Harwell. His sad demise now gives Ewing Oil a 40-8 lead over SVD.

At the End of April...

2010-05-01T17:46:00.000-07:00

With four months in the books, Ewing Oil is holding on to a 32-8 lead over Sweet Valley Death. A recap:

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32

Sweet Valley Death:
April -- John Forsythe, 8

S.V.D. Gets on the Board

2010-04-03T07:35:00.000-07:00

After a slow start to the season, Sweet Valley Death has added their first score of the year with the death of actor John Forsythe, 92. S.V.D. now trails Ewing Oil by the score of 32-8.

At the End of March...

2010-04-01T07:34:00.000-07:00

With three months in the books, Ewing Oil is holding on to a 32-0 lead over Sweet Valley Death. A recap:

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32

At the End of February...

2010-03-01T07:34:00.000-08:00

With two months in the books, Ewing Oil maintains a 32-0 lead over Sweet Valley Death. A recap:

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32

At the End of January...

2010-02-02T15:22:00.000-08:00

With one month in the books, Ewing Oil has taken a 32-0 lead over Sweet Valley Death. A recap:

Ewing Oil:
January -- Chemical Ali, 32

Ewing Oil on the Board First in 2010

2010-01-25T07:01:00.000-08:00

Ewing Oil has struck first in the new edition of Our Sick Game with the execution of Iraq's very own Chemical Ali, 68. The death of Ali Hassan al-Majid gives Ewing Oil an early 32-0 lead on Sweet Valley Death.

Our Sick Game MVP Announced

2010-01-02T16:11:00.000-08:00

In a unanimous vote and an Our Sick Game first, the MVP award will be shared by two players for 2009: Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson. Fawcett's death gave Ewing Oil a lead in the game it would not relinquish, and Michael Jackson's death just a short time later put the game out of reach.

"We recognize that it was Farrah who gave Ewing Oil the lead for good, but Jackson's death also had a significant and dramatic impact on the game," said a spokesperson for the league. "Let's not forget that his death allowed Ewing Oil to collect a hat trick for the month of June, as well. Make no mistake, their deaths changed the game in 2009 and allowed Ewing Oil to roll on to victory."

Fawcett and Jackson now take their place among the illustrious list of prior league MVP's:

2009 - Farrah Fawcett/Michael Jackson
2008 - Tony Snow
2007 - Anna Nicole Smith
2006 - Fidel Castro
2005 - Peter Jennings

Ewing Oil, 2009 Champion

2010-01-01T06:20:00.001-08:00

Congratulations to the winner of Our Sick Game 2009, Ewing Oil. In the most dominating and high-scoring performance in the history of Our Sick Game, Ewing Oil put to rest three years of frustration against the previously unbeatable Sweet Valley Death, winning the game by a score of 376-244.5

As champion of Our Sick Game, Ewing Oil has earned a year with the Johnny Carson Cup, the most hallowed and cherished trophy in the world. In addition, Ewing Oil's prize will be a $50 gift card to Best Buy.

Survivor Series 2010 Picks

2009-12-31T20:48:00.000-08:00

A huge fan favorite of Our Sick Game is the Survivor Series. Each team selects 15 players from the other team's roster who they believe will not die in 2010. If each of the selected players remains alive at the end of 2010, 15 points will be awarded to the lucky team. No partial credit will be awarded. Mediocrity is frowned upon, not rewarded, here at Our Sick Game.

Ewing Oil:

Loni Anderson
Kurt Angle
Earl Campbell
John Daly
Michael J. Fox
Kelsey Grammer
Don Imus
Alex Karras
Barry Manilow
Tracy Morgan
Al Pacino
Richard Petty
Bubba Smith
Stephen Tyler
Don Zimmer

Sweet Valley Death:

Pam Anderson
Bobby Brown
Bill Clinton
Roger Ebert
Scott Hall
Hulk Hogan
Whitney Houston
Terry Jones
Penny Marshall
Barack Obama
Ashley Olson
Rowdy Roddy Piper
Nicole Richie
Mickey Rourke
Mike Tyson

Moneyballs Announced

2009-12-30T20:34:00.000-08:00

The start of the 2010 season of Our Sick Game can only mean one thing: the long-awaited announcement of Moneyball selections.

Sweet Valley Death has selected Libyan sensation Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi (57) as their moneyball for 2010. The "Lockerbie Bomber" would earn S.V.D. a tidy 86 points upon his death. For their moneyball selection, Ewing Oil has chosen their third pick of the draft, former president of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Gay Culverhouse (62). Her death would earn Ewing Oil 76 big points.

Good luck to Sweet Valley Death, Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi, Ewing Oil, and Gay Culverhouse in the upcoming season.

Don't Forget the Keepers

2009-12-30T20:26:00.001-08:00

Rounding out the lineup for Ewing Oil and Sweet Valley Death are 10 keepers from the 2009 rosters.

Ewing Oil:

Ali Hassan al-Majd, 68
Mel Brooks, 83
Al Davis, 80
Andy Dick, 44
Annette Funicello, 67
Artie Lange, 42
Lindsay Lohan, 23
Courtney Love, 45
Britney Spears, 28
Ron Springs, 53

Sweet Valley Death:

Sevi Ballesteros, 52
Ronnie Biggs, 80
Bobby Bowden, 80
Aretha Franklin, 67
Kelsey Grammer, 54
David Hasselhoff, 57
Steve Jobs, 54
Rue McClanahan, 75
Richard Petty, 72
Queen Elizabeth II, 83

Don't Forget the Grandfathers

2009-12-30T20:15:00.000-08:00

These players have been with the same team for at least three consecutive years, which is the criteria in this game for being "grandfathered," or staying with the same team until death.

Ewing Oil:

Muhammad Ali, 67
Ray Bradbury, 89
Rosalyn Carter, 83
Barbara Bush, 84
Roger Ebert, 67
Luis Echeverria, 87
Elizabeth Edwards, 60
Betty Ford, 91
Malcolm Glazer, 81
Larry Hagman, 78
Terry Jones, 67
Ken Kercheval, 74
Jack Kevorkian, 81
Henry Kissinger, 86
Phil Lesh, 69
Nelson Mandella, 91
Tom McEwen, 86
Leslie Nielsen, 83
Don Pardo, 91
Pope Benedict XVI, 82
Nancy Reagan, 88
Keith Richards, 66
Nicole Richie, 28
Andy Rooney, 90
Sherwood Schwartz, 93
Ariel Sharon, 81
Harry Dean Stanton, 83
George Steinbrenner, 79
Elizabeth Taylor, 77
Helen Thomas, 89
Eli Wallach, 94

Sweet Valley Death:

Iyad Allawi, 64
Louis Anderson, 56
Ed Asner, 80
Chuck Bednarik, 84
Chuck Berry, 83
Wilford Brimley, 75
Fidel Castro, 83
Dick Clark, 80
Beverly Cleary, 93
Ruby Dee, 85
Andy Griffith, 83
Stephen Hawking, 67
Liza Minelli, 63
Roger Moore, 82
Stan Musial, 89
Arnold Palmer, 80
Carl Reiner, 87
Don Rickles, 83
Pat Summerall, 79
Vern Troyer, 40
Abe Vigoda, 88
Jonathan Winters, 84
Chuck Yeager, 86

Ewing Oil Draft Results

2009-12-30T19:40:00.000-08:00

With the second overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected singer Loretta Lynn. Here are the rest of Ewing Oil's 2010 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Kareem Abdul-Jabar, 62 (82)
Bud Adams, 86 (79)
Pamela Anderson, 42 (21)
Neil Armstrong, 79 (58)
F. Lee Bailey, 76 (27)
Bob Barker, 86 (35)
Rudy Boesch, 81 (81)
Ernest Borgnine, 92 (70)
Bobby Brown, 40 (33)
Jim Brown, 73 (46)
Pat Burns, 57 (30)
Jimmy Carter, 85 (32)
Dick Cheney, 68 (50)
Bill Clinton, 63 (83)
Jeff Conaway, 59 (16)
Barry Corbin, 69 (63)
Bill Cosby, 72 (67)
David Crosby, 68 (5)
Gay Culverhouse, 62 (3)
Ann B. Davis, 83 (62)
Conrad Dobler, 59 (38)
Bob Dole, 86 (45)
Pete Domenici, 77 (64)
Charles Durning, 86 (6)
Bob Dylan, 68 (26)
Clint Eastwood, 79 (56)
Louis Farrakhan, 76 (28)
Zsa Zsa Gabor, 92 (72)
Teri Garr, 65 (57)
Billy Graham, 91 (44)
Bud Grant, 82 (78)
Merle Haggard, 72 (24)
Scott Hall, 51 (15)
Ernie Harwell, 91 (9)
Richard Hayward, 63 (4)
Hugh Hefner, 83 (34)
Hulk Hogan, 57 (43)
Hal Holbrook, 84 (36)
Whitney Houston, 46 (71)
Joe Jackson, 80 (10)
Al Jaffee, 88 (76)
Larry King, 76 (65)
Kris Kristofferson, 73 (66)
Martin Landau, 81 (48)
Angela Lansbury, 84 (29)
Jerry Lee Lewis, 74 (37)
Sidney Lumet, 85 (53)
Loretta Lynn, 75 (1)
John Madden, 73 (55)
Bernie Madoff, 71 (18)
Penny Marshall, 66 (77)
Art Modell, 84 (42)
Walter Mondale, 81 (47)
Harry Morgan, 94 (69)
Willie Nelson, 76 (25)
Bob Newhart, 80 (51)
Barack Obama, 48 (49)
Ashley Olsen, 23 (19)
Ferdie Pacheco, 82 (20)
Joe Paterno, 83 (39)
Dave Pear, 56 (22)
Ross Perot, 79 (41)
Bum Phillips, 86 (31)
Rowdy Roddy Piper, 55 (8)
Roman Polanski, 76 (11)
Charlotte Rae, 83 (59)
Mickey Rourke, 57 (84)
Bill Russell, 75 (54)
Suzanne Somers, 63 (17)
Phil Spector, 70 (52)
John Paul Stevens, 92 (73)
Stephen Stills, 64 (13)
Orlando Thomas, 37 (7)
Mike Tyson, 43 (14)
Dick Van Dyke, 84 (74)
Dick Vitale, 70 (61)
Claus Von Bulow, 83 (23)
Joseph Wapner, 90 (60)
Brian Wilson, 67 (68)
Ralph Wilson, 91 (80)
Amy Winehouse, 26 (2)
Tex Winter, 87 (75)
Burt Young, 69 (12)
Paul Zimmerman, 77 (40)

Sweet Valley Death Draft Results

2009-12-30T18:38:00.000-08:00

With the first overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected actress Kathryn Joosten. Here are the rest of Sweet Valley Death's 2010 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi, 57 (3)
Paul Allen, 56 (2)
Loni Anderson, 64 (90)
Kurt Angle, 41 (56)
Alan Arkin, 75 (58)
Lauren Bacall, 85 (61)
Yogi Berra, 84 (34)
Tom Bosley, 82 (44)
George H.W. Bush, 85 (41)
Earl Campbell, 54 (45)
Raul Castro, 78 (92)
Grizz Chapman, 35 (8)
Tommy Chong, 71 (76)
Sean Connery, 79 (66)
Tony Curtis, 84 (23)
John Daly, 43 (20)
Richard Dawson, 77 (46)
Doris Day, 87 (28)
Olivia de Havilland, 93 (89)
Hugh Downs, 88 (71)
Kirk Douglas, 93 (65)
Peter Falk, 82 (7)
Blake Fielder-Civil, 27 (9)
John Forsythe, 91 (72)
Michael J. Fox, 48 (6)
Peter Gammons, 64 (74)
Peaches Geldof, 20 (67)
Frank Gifford, 79 (68)
Gary Glitter, 65 (49)
John Goodman, 57 (48)
Mikhail Gorbachev, 78 (11)
Gene Hackman, 79 (47)
Ismail Haniya, 46 (26)
Katherine Helmond, 81 (51)
Buck Henry, 79 (77)
Dennis Hopper, 73 (10)
Don Imus, 69 (24)
Keith Jackson, 81 (62)
Alexa Ray Joel, 24 (35)
Kathryn Joosten, 70 (1)
Alex Karras, 74 (64)
Casey Kasem, 77 (78)
Stacy Keach, 68 (22)
George Kennedy, 84 (17)
Richard Kiel, 70 (60)
B.B. King, 84 (38)
Jake LaMotta, 88 (63)
Christopher Lee, 87 (88)
Jerry Lewis, 83 (37)
Barry Manilow, 66 (33)
George McGovern, 87 (32)
Mindy McReady, 34 (69)
Urban Meyer, 45 (25)
Simon Monjack, 39 (5)
Tracy Morgan, 41 (79)
Leonard Nimoy, 78 (81)
Chuck Noll, 77 (40)
Sandra Day O' Connor, 79 (85)
Mary Kate Olsen, 23 (19)
Al Pacino, 69 (87)
David Petraeus, 57 (13)
Prince Phillip, 88 (42)
Frederick Pohl, 90 (83)
Sidney Poitier, 82 (30)
David Prowse, 74 (55)
Burt Reynolds, 73 (91)
Tony Roberts, 70 (54)
Samantha Ronson, 32 (15)
Mickey Rooney, 89 (84)
Buddy Ryan, 75 (31)
Vin Scully, 82 (29)
William Shatner, 78 (86)
Don Shula, 79 (73)
O.J. Simpson, 62 (27)
Manmohan Singh, 77 (39)
Bubba Smith, 64 (12)
Arlen Specter, 79 (53)
Donald Sutherland, 74 (50)
Margaret Thatcher, 84 (70)
Stephen Tyler, 61 (14)
Jerry Van Dyke, 78 (75)
Dick Van Patten, 81 (52)
Jack Vance, 93 (80)
Mike Wallace, 91 (59)
Andrew Lloyd Weber, 61 (18)
Scott Weiland, 42 (4)
Betty White, 87 (36)
Gene Wilder, 76 (43)
Andy Williams, 82 (57)
Adam Yauch, 45 (16)
Manuel Zelaya, 57 (82)
Don Zimmer, 78 (21)

At the End of November...

2009-12-01T17:26:00.001-08:00

With just one month left in the season, Ewing Oil holds a 361-244.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8
July -- Karl Malden, 3, Robert McNamara, 7, Corazon Aquino, 24 (+10 hat trick bonus)
August -- * Successful Insurance taken on Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Robert Novak, 22
September -- Patrick Swayze, 86
October -- Soupy Sales, 17

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)
July -- Walter Cronkite, 8, Jim Johnson, 32
August -- Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Les Paul, 6, Ted Kennedy 23, Dominick Dunne, 17 (+10 hat trick bonus)
September -- Mary Travers, 28, Susan Atkins, 78

At the End of October...

2009-11-01T09:07:00.000-08:00

With just two months left in the season, Ewing Oil holds a 361-244.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8
July -- Karl Malden, 3, Robert McNamara, 7, Corazon Aquino, 24 (+10 hat trick bonus)
August -- * Successful Insurance taken on Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Robert Novak, 22
September -- Patrick Swayze, 86
October -- Soupy Sales, 17

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)
July -- Walter Cronkite, 8, Jim Johnson, 32
August -- Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Les Paul, 6, Ted Kennedy 23, Dominick Dunne, 17 (+10 hat trick bonus)
September -- Mary Travers, 28, Susan Atkins, 78

S.V.D. Begins Its Comeback with Sales

2009-10-23T04:52:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death needs to rally big-time to catch Ewing Oil with just over two months left in the season. Today, S.V.D. began its comeback attempt with the death of comic Soupy Sales, 83. His 17 points narrows the game's deficit to 361-234.5.

At the End of September...

2009-10-03T19:47:00.000-07:00

With nine months of the season now in the books, Ewing Oil has blown the game open and now holds a 361-227.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8
July -- Karl Malden, 3, Robert McNamara, 7, Corazon Aquino, 24 (+10 hat trick bonus)
August -- * Successful Insurance taken on Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Robert Novak, 22
September -- Patrick Swayze, 86

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)
July -- Walter Cronkite, 8, Jim Johnson, 32
August -- Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Les Paul, 6, Ted Kennedy 23, Dominick Dunne, 17 (+10 hat trick bonus)
September -- Mary Travers, 28, Susan Atkins, 78

Ewing Oil Moneyball!: Susan Atkins Dead at 61

2009-09-26T06:45:00.001-07:00

A little over a week after the death of Sweet Valley Death's moneyball Patrick Swayze, Ewing Oil has shockingly answered with the death of its very own moneyball, Susan Atkins. The 61-year-old Manson Family member's 78 points have shot Ewing Oil out to a formidable 361-227.5 lead with just over three months left in the game.

"This is exactly what we expected not only when we drafted Susan, but when we put the moneyball tag on her as well," said a spokesperson for Ewing Oil. "We knew that with Swayze on the books that we'd need a big answer, and we sure got one."

Ewing Oil Answers With a Travers

2009-09-16T18:30:00.001-07:00

Just two days after the death of S.V.D.'s Patrick Swayze, Ewing Oil has recouped some of their losses with the death of 72-year-old Mary Travers of the group Peter, Paul, and Mary. Her 28 points extends Ewing Oil's lead to 283-227.5.

Sweet Valley Moneyball!: Swayze Dead at 57

2009-09-15T16:59:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death's moneyball, Patrick Swayze, died yesterday from pancreatic cancer at the age of 57. As S.V.D.'s moneyball, Swayze doubled his value of 43 to a whopping total of 86. His death narrows Ewing Oil's lead to 255-227.5

At the End of August...

2009-09-01T16:39:00.000-07:00

With eight months of the season now in the books, Ewing Oil has blown the game open and now holds a 255-141.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8
July -- Karl Malden, 3, Robert McNamara, 7, Corazon Aquino, 24 (+10 hat trick bonus)
August -- * Successful Insurance taken on Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Robert Novak, 22

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)
July -- Walter Cronkite, 8, Jim Johnson, 32
August -- Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Les Paul, 6, Ted Kennedy 23, Dominick Dunne, 17 (+10 hat trick bonus)

Ewing Oil Not Even Close to Dunne

2009-08-26T20:03:00.000-07:00

For the second time this season, Ewing Oil has had two deaths in a 24-hour span. First, the death of Sen. Ted Kennedy last night, and then today, the death of author Dominick Dunne, 83. His 17 points extends Ewing Oil's lead to 255-141.5. This is the second time Ewing Oil has recorded four deaths in one month (July, 2007).

"Just speechless right now," said a spokesperson for Ewing Oil. "Kennedy and Dunne in one day. This is almost too good to be true."

Kennedy Gives Ewing Oil a Trick

2009-08-26T04:51:00.000-07:00

The death of Sen. Ted Kennedy, 77, has given Ewing Oil a hat trick for the month of August. Following S.V.D.'s own recent victim of brain cancer, Robert Novack, Ewing Oil has answered right back with their second Kennedy casualty of the month. The 23 points of Ewing Oil's first overall pick in the 2009 draft, plus the 10 bonus hat trick points, now gives Ewing Oil a 238-141.5 lead.

"The pattern this year so far seems to be that when S.V.D. scores, we answer back," said a spokesperson for Ewing Oil. "I couldn't be prouder of our team than I am at this moment."

Novak Answers for S.V.D.

2009-08-18T16:00:00.000-07:00

The most entertaining season ever of Our Sick Game just keeps getting better and better. Today, Sweet Valley Death's Robert Novak, 78, died after a long battle with brain cancer. His 22 points cuts Ewing Oil's lead to 205-143.5.

Original Guitar Hero Les Paul Dead

2009-08-13T15:34:00.000-07:00

Ewing Oil has quickly rebounded from the disappointment of Sweet Valley Death's successful insurance claim on Eunice Kennedy Shriver with the death of guitar legend Les Paul. The 94 year old's six points serve to counter the six points denied Ewing Oil by S.V.D. from Shriver's death. Now with two deaths barely halfway through the month, Ewing Oil is an excellent spot to convert the coveted hat trick.
"Les came through," said a spokesperson for Ewing Oil. "S.V.D. did their thing this week, but this is how we roll now. We're not going to take their crap lying down anymore."
Ewing Oil has extended their lead to 205-121.5, and in seven and a half months have already shattered their own single season mark for points scored.

Insurance A Success

2009-08-11T04:25:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death has pulled off a successful insurance policy following the death this morning of Eunice Kennedy Shriver. Her 12 points -- six of which were awarded to Ewing Oil when the policy was taken -- will be split by the two teams. As a result, S.V.D. picks up the remaining six points, and now trails by the score of 199-121.5.

Insurance Taken Out on Eunice Kennedy Shriver

2009-08-07T19:25:00.001-07:00

Sweet Valley Death is taking no chances with the health status of Eunice Kennedy Shriver, who was rushed to the hospital today and is listed in critical condition. S.V.D. has taken out an insurance policy on the 88-year-old, thus awarding six points to Ewing Oil. If Kennedy Shriver does not pass away by 10:14 p.m on August 17, the additional six points will be awarded to Ewing Oil. Should she die before that time, however, S.V.D. will claim those six points. As of now, Ewing Oil leads by the score of 199-115.5.

At the End of July...

2009-08-01T11:22:00.000-07:00

With seven months of the season now in the books, Ewing Oil has maintained control of the game with a 193-115.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8
July -- Karl Malden, 3, Robert McNamara, 7, Corazon Aquino, 24 (+10 hat trick bonus)

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)
July -- Walter Cronkite, 8, Jim Johnson, 32

S.V.D. Answers Ewing Oil with Death and a Trick

2009-07-31T14:59:00.000-07:00

Just two days after reeling from the 4th of July special delivered by Ewing Oil, Sweet Valley Death has answered back on the last day of the month. The 24 points off the death of Corazon Aquino, 76, coupled with the two deaths registered earlier in July, gives S.V.D. 10 bonus points to cut Ewing Oil's lead from 193-115.5. One of the most exciting seasons ever of Our Sick Game just keeps getting better and better.

Ewing Oil Cashes in on 4th Pick

2009-07-28T20:36:00.000-07:00

Ewing Oil can seemingly do no wrong this season. The team's pick in the 4th of July Supplemental Draft, Jim Johnson, has died at the age of 68. His 32 points now give Ewing Oil a 193-81.5 lead. Ewing Oil has never lost a season in which its 4th of July pick has died, a fact not lost on its leadership.
"This was a huge, huge death," said a spokesperson for Ewing Oil. "We took Jim knowing he was in real bad shape and these are 32 enormous points. We're in a good position now. S.V.D. will need more than Patrick Swayze to beat us in the end."

Cronkite Signs Off for the Last Time

2009-07-18T08:46:00.000-07:00

One of Ewing Oil's longest-tenured players, Walter Cronkite, has finally died at the age of 92. His eight points effectively cancel out the recent death of Sweet Valley Death's Robert McNamara, and give extends Ewing Oils lead to 161 to 81.5.

Sweet Valley Death Adds a Touchdown

2009-07-06T15:45:00.000-07:00

Sweet Valley Death is bouncing back from a devastating June by notching two deaths in the first week of July. First Karl Malden, now Robert McNamara. The former defense secretary under Presidents Kennedy and Johnson died today at the age of 93. His seven points inch Sweet Valley Death closer to Ewing Oil, who now leads 153-81.5. Sweet Valley death also has over three weeks left to complete a hat trick, worth an additional ten points.

The Picks Are In...

2009-07-04T14:58:00.000-07:00

One of the most anticipated events in every season of Our Sick Game is the 4th of July Supplemental Draft. As per custom, the team trailing on July 4 gets the first pick in the draft. This year, that team is Sweet Valley Death. With their selection, S.V.D. chose Chewbacca, also known as British actor Peter Mayhew, 65.
Ewing Oil chose former Philadelphia Eagles defensive coordinator Jim Johnson, 68, who is suffering from cancer. Best of luck to both teams down the stretch.

Karl Malden from Downtown. Yes! A Three-Pointer!

2009-07-01T14:39:00.001-07:00

Sweet Valley Death has kicked off July in style with the death of its very own Karl Malden, 97. His three points have narrowed the gap with Ewing Oil to 153-74.5.

At the end of June...

2009-07-01T14:35:00.000-07:00

With the first half of the season now in the books, Ewing Oil has taken control of the game with a 153.71.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)

MICHAEL JACKSON DEAD AT 50

2009-06-25T15:31:00.000-07:00

In the busiest day in the history of Our Sick Game -- a day which began with the news of the death of Farrah Fawcett -- now comes the news that Ewing Oil's Michael Jackson has died at the age of 50.
At 6:00 p.m. this evening, Sweet Valley Death attempted to take out an insurance policy on Jackson. We have learned, however, that Jackson had died prior to Sweet Valley Death's attempt at insurance. Thus, Ewing Oil has earned Jackson's entire allotment of 50 points. In addition, Ewing Oil's three deaths in the month of June have earned the team a "hat trick" bonus of 10 points. As a result, Ewing Oil now leads to 153-71.5.
In even worse news for Sweet Valley Death, Michael Jackson's inclusion on its Survivor Series list means that S.V.D. cannot earn 15 bonus points at the end of the season.
"This has been the wildest day in the history of Our Sick Game," said a spokesperson for Ewing Oil. "It has also been the most successful in Ewing Oil history. We honor both Farrah and Michael for their contributions. The truest form of tribute would be to bring the Carson Cup back home at the end of the year."

Ewing Oil Striking It Rich

2009-06-25T10:12:00.000-07:00

Ewing Oil has retaken the lead from Sweet Valley Death this week on the strength of two solid deaths. The deaths of Ed McMahon, 86, (14 points) and Farrah Fawcett, 62, (38 points) chipped in a combined 52 points to propel Ewing Oil to a 93-71.5 lead.

At the end of May...

2009-06-01T10:09:00.000-07:00

With five months elapsed in the game, Sweet Valley Death has retaken the lead by the score of 71.5-41. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14

Dead Doms Boost S.V.D.

2009-05-09T07:35:00.001-07:00

S.V.D. has retaken the lead over Ewing Oil early in the month of May with back-to-back deaths involving two noted Doms: DeLuise and DiMaggio. Dom DeLuise, 75, and Dom DiMaggio, 92, combined to give S.V.D. 33 points, giving them a 71.5-41 lead over Ewing Oil. The two deaths also set S.V.D. up for a potential hat trick in May, which would be the first since January of 2008.

At the end of April...

2009-05-01T06:10:00.001-07:00

With four months and a four deaths in the books, Ewing Oil has opened a narrow lead on the defending champion Sweet Valley Death by a score of 41-38.5. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14

Bringing Things Up to Date

2009-04-30T06:03:00.000-07:00

A lot happened in the month of April so here's a quick attempt to bring everyone up to date.

On April 14, broadcaster Harry Kalas died at the age of 73. Ewing Oil thus earned 27 points and took the lead in the game 27-22 over S.V.D. One week later on April 21, S.V.D.'s Stephen Hawking was rushed to the hospital in serious condition. Ewing Oil, anticipating his death, took out an insurance policy at that time. S.V.D. immediately earned 16.5 points, or half of his value, and re-took the lead by a score of 38.5-27. On April 25, Bea Arthur, 86, died at her home in Los Angeles to make the score 41-38.5 in favor of Ewing Oil.

At the End of March...

2009-04-01T06:02:00.000-07:00

With three months and a two deaths in the books, defending champion Sweet Valley Death holds a 22-0 lead over Ewing Oil. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10

At the End of February...

2009-03-01T11:28:00.000-08:00

With two months and a two deaths in the books, defending champion Sweet Valley Death holds a 22-0 lead over Ewing Oil. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10

Harvey Signs off at 90

2009-02-28T11:22:00.000-08:00

Radio legend and Sweet Valley Death regular Paul Harvey has gone to the great recording studio in the sky. Harvey, 90, passed away in Phoenix and leaves the Earth by contributing 10 points to S.V.D, which now leads the game 22-0.

At the End of January...

2009-02-08T09:41:00.000-08:00

With one month and a few days in the books, defending champion Sweet Valley Death holds a 12-0 lead over Ewing Oil. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12

Sweet Valley Death Strikes First

2009-01-14T19:02:00.000-08:00

Sweet Valley Death has gotten on the board first in 2009 with the death of actor Ricardo Montalban. The 88-year-old has earned staked the defending champions 12-0 lead. The team that has scored first has gone on to win the championship every year of Our Sick Game.