Our Sick Game 2014

A huge fan favorite of Our Sick Game is the Survivor Series. Each team selects 15 players from the other team's roster who they believe will not die in 2010. If each of the selected players remains alive at the end of 2010, 15 points will be awarded to the lucky team. No partial credit will be awarded. Mediocrity is frowned upon, not rewarded, here at Our Sick Game.

Ewing Oil:

Loni Anderson
Kurt Angle
Earl Campbell
John Daly
Michael J. Fox
Kelsey Grammer
Don Imus
Alex Karras
Barry Manilow
Tracy Morgan
Al Pacino
Richard Petty
Bubba Smith
Stephen Tyler
Don Zimmer

Sweet Valley Death:

Pam Anderson
Bobby Brown
Bill Clinton
Roger Ebert
Scott Hall
Hulk Hogan
Whitney Houston
Terry Jones
Penny Marshall
Barack Obama
Ashley Olson
Rowdy Roddy Piper
Nicole Richie
Mickey Rourke
Mike Tyson

The start of the 2010 season of Our Sick Game can only mean one thing: the long-awaited announcement of Moneyball selections.

Sweet Valley Death has selected Libyan sensation Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi (57) as their moneyball for 2010. The "Lockerbie Bomber" would earn S.V.D. a tidy 86 points upon his death. For their moneyball selection, Ewing Oil has chosen their third pick of the draft, former president of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Gay Culverhouse (62). Her death would earn Ewing Oil 76 big points.

Good luck to Sweet Valley Death, Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi, Ewing Oil, and Gay Culverhouse in the upcoming season.

Rounding out the lineup for Ewing Oil and Sweet Valley Death are 10 keepers from the 2009 rosters.

Ewing Oil:

Ali Hassan al-Majd, 68
Mel Brooks, 83
Al Davis, 80
Andy Dick, 44
Annette Funicello, 67
Artie Lange, 42
Lindsay Lohan, 23
Courtney Love, 45
Britney Spears, 28
Ron Springs, 53

Sweet Valley Death:

Sevi Ballesteros, 52
Ronnie Biggs, 80
Bobby Bowden, 80
Aretha Franklin, 67
Kelsey Grammer, 54
David Hasselhoff, 57
Steve Jobs, 54
Rue McClanahan, 75
Richard Petty, 72
Queen Elizabeth II, 83

These players have been with the same team for at least three consecutive years, which is the criteria in this game for being "grandfathered," or staying with the same team until death.

Ewing Oil:

Muhammad Ali, 67
Ray Bradbury, 89
Rosalyn Carter, 83
Barbara Bush, 84
Roger Ebert, 67
Luis Echeverria, 87
Elizabeth Edwards, 60
Betty Ford, 91
Malcolm Glazer, 81
Larry Hagman, 78
Terry Jones, 67
Ken Kercheval, 74
Jack Kevorkian, 81
Henry Kissinger, 86
Phil Lesh, 69
Nelson Mandella, 91
Tom McEwen, 86
Leslie Nielsen, 83
Don Pardo, 91
Pope Benedict XVI, 82
Nancy Reagan, 88
Keith Richards, 66
Nicole Richie, 28
Andy Rooney, 90
Sherwood Schwartz, 93
Ariel Sharon, 81
Harry Dean Stanton, 83
George Steinbrenner, 79
Elizabeth Taylor, 77
Helen Thomas, 89
Eli Wallach, 94

Sweet Valley Death:

Iyad Allawi, 64
Louis Anderson, 56
Ed Asner, 80
Chuck Bednarik, 84
Chuck Berry, 83
Wilford Brimley, 75
Fidel Castro, 83
Dick Clark, 80
Beverly Cleary, 93
Ruby Dee, 85
Andy Griffith, 83
Stephen Hawking, 67
Liza Minelli, 63
Roger Moore, 82
Stan Musial, 89
Arnold Palmer, 80
Carl Reiner, 87
Don Rickles, 83
Pat Summerall, 79
Vern Troyer, 40
Abe Vigoda, 88
Jonathan Winters, 84
Chuck Yeager, 86

With the second overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected singer Loretta Lynn. Here are the rest of Ewing Oil's 2010 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Kareem Abdul-Jabar, 62 (82)
Bud Adams, 86 (79)
Pamela Anderson, 42 (21)
Neil Armstrong, 79 (58)
F. Lee Bailey, 76 (27)
Bob Barker, 86 (35)
Rudy Boesch, 81 (81)
Ernest Borgnine, 92 (70)
Bobby Brown, 40 (33)
Jim Brown, 73 (46)
Pat Burns, 57 (30)
Jimmy Carter, 85 (32)
Dick Cheney, 68 (50)
Bill Clinton, 63 (83)
Jeff Conaway, 59 (16)
Barry Corbin, 69 (63)
Bill Cosby, 72 (67)
David Crosby, 68 (5)
Gay Culverhouse, 62 (3)
Ann B. Davis, 83 (62)
Conrad Dobler, 59 (38)
Bob Dole, 86 (45)
Pete Domenici, 77 (64)
Charles Durning, 86 (6)
Bob Dylan, 68 (26)
Clint Eastwood, 79 (56)
Louis Farrakhan, 76 (28)
Zsa Zsa Gabor, 92 (72)
Teri Garr, 65 (57)
Billy Graham, 91 (44)
Bud Grant, 82 (78)
Merle Haggard, 72 (24)
Scott Hall, 51 (15)
Ernie Harwell, 91 (9)
Richard Hayward, 63 (4)
Hugh Hefner, 83 (34)
Hulk Hogan, 57 (43)
Hal Holbrook, 84 (36)
Whitney Houston, 46 (71)
Joe Jackson, 80 (10)
Al Jaffee, 88 (76)
Larry King, 76 (65)
Kris Kristofferson, 73 (66)
Martin Landau, 81 (48)
Angela Lansbury, 84 (29)
Jerry Lee Lewis, 74 (37)
Sidney Lumet, 85 (53)
Loretta Lynn, 75 (1)
John Madden, 73 (55)
Bernie Madoff, 71 (18)
Penny Marshall, 66 (77)
Art Modell, 84 (42)
Walter Mondale, 81 (47)
Harry Morgan, 94 (69)
Willie Nelson, 76 (25)
Bob Newhart, 80 (51)
Barack Obama, 48 (49)
Ashley Olsen, 23 (19)
Ferdie Pacheco, 82 (20)
Joe Paterno, 83 (39)
Dave Pear, 56 (22)
Ross Perot, 79 (41)
Bum Phillips, 86 (31)
Rowdy Roddy Piper, 55 (8)
Roman Polanski, 76 (11)
Charlotte Rae, 83 (59)
Mickey Rourke, 57 (84)
Bill Russell, 75 (54)
Suzanne Somers, 63 (17)
Phil Spector, 70 (52)
John Paul Stevens, 92 (73)
Stephen Stills, 64 (13)
Orlando Thomas, 37 (7)
Mike Tyson, 43 (14)
Dick Van Dyke, 84 (74)
Dick Vitale, 70 (61)
Claus Von Bulow, 83 (23)
Joseph Wapner, 90 (60)
Brian Wilson, 67 (68)
Ralph Wilson, 91 (80)
Amy Winehouse, 26 (2)
Tex Winter, 87 (75)
Burt Young, 69 (12)
Paul Zimmerman, 77 (40)

With the first overall pick, Sweet Valley Death selected actress Kathryn Joosten. Here are the rest of Sweet Valley Death's 2010 draft picks, listed alphabetically followed by their age and location drafted.

Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi, 57 (3)
Paul Allen, 56 (2)
Loni Anderson, 64 (90)
Kurt Angle, 41 (56)
Alan Arkin, 75 (58)
Lauren Bacall, 85 (61)
Yogi Berra, 84 (34)
Tom Bosley, 82 (44)
George H.W. Bush, 85 (41)
Earl Campbell, 54 (45)
Raul Castro, 78 (92)
Grizz Chapman, 35 (8)
Tommy Chong, 71 (76)
Sean Connery, 79 (66)
Tony Curtis, 84 (23)
John Daly, 43 (20)
Richard Dawson, 77 (46)
Doris Day, 87 (28)
Olivia de Havilland, 93 (89)
Hugh Downs, 88 (71)
Kirk Douglas, 93 (65)
Peter Falk, 82 (7)
Blake Fielder-Civil, 27 (9)
John Forsythe, 91 (72)
Michael J. Fox, 48 (6)
Peter Gammons, 64 (74)
Peaches Geldof, 20 (67)
Frank Gifford, 79 (68)
Gary Glitter, 65 (49)
John Goodman, 57 (48)
Mikhail Gorbachev, 78 (11)
Gene Hackman, 79 (47)
Ismail Haniya, 46 (26)
Katherine Helmond, 81 (51)
Buck Henry, 79 (77)
Dennis Hopper, 73 (10)
Don Imus, 69 (24)
Keith Jackson, 81 (62)
Alexa Ray Joel, 24 (35)
Kathryn Joosten, 70 (1)
Alex Karras, 74 (64)
Casey Kasem, 77 (78)
Stacy Keach, 68 (22)
George Kennedy, 84 (17)
Richard Kiel, 70 (60)
B.B. King, 84 (38)
Jake LaMotta, 88 (63)
Christopher Lee, 87 (88)
Jerry Lewis, 83 (37)
Barry Manilow, 66 (33)
George McGovern, 87 (32)
Mindy McReady, 34 (69)
Urban Meyer, 45 (25)
Simon Monjack, 39 (5)
Tracy Morgan, 41 (79)
Leonard Nimoy, 78 (81)
Chuck Noll, 77 (40)
Sandra Day O' Connor, 79 (85)
Mary Kate Olsen, 23 (19)
Al Pacino, 69 (87)
David Petraeus, 57 (13)
Prince Phillip, 88 (42)
Frederick Pohl, 90 (83)
Sidney Poitier, 82 (30)
David Prowse, 74 (55)
Burt Reynolds, 73 (91)
Tony Roberts, 70 (54)
Samantha Ronson, 32 (15)
Mickey Rooney, 89 (84)
Buddy Ryan, 75 (31)
Vin Scully, 82 (29)
William Shatner, 78 (86)
Don Shula, 79 (73)
O.J. Simpson, 62 (27)
Manmohan Singh, 77 (39)
Bubba Smith, 64 (12)
Arlen Specter, 79 (53)
Donald Sutherland, 74 (50)
Margaret Thatcher, 84 (70)
Stephen Tyler, 61 (14)
Jerry Van Dyke, 78 (75)
Dick Van Patten, 81 (52)
Jack Vance, 93 (80)
Mike Wallace, 91 (59)
Andrew Lloyd Weber, 61 (18)
Scott Weiland, 42 (4)
Betty White, 87 (36)
Gene Wilder, 76 (43)
Andy Williams, 82 (57)
Adam Yauch, 45 (16)
Manuel Zelaya, 57 (82)
Don Zimmer, 78 (21)

With just one month left in the season, Ewing Oil holds a 361-244.5 lead. A recap:

Sweet Valley Death:
January -- Ricardo Montalban, 12
February -- Paul Harvey, 10
April -- * Insurance taken on Stephen Hawking, 16.5
May -- Dom DeLuise, 25, Dom DiMaggio, 8
July -- Karl Malden, 3, Robert McNamara, 7, Corazon Aquino, 24 (+10 hat trick bonus)
August -- * Successful Insurance taken on Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Robert Novak, 22
September -- Patrick Swayze, 86
October -- Soupy Sales, 17

Ewing Oil:
April -- Harry Kalas, 27, Bea Arthur, 14
June -- Ed McMahon, 14, Farrah Fawcett, 38, Michael Jackson, 50 (+10 hat trick bonus)
July -- Walter Cronkite, 8, Jim Johnson, 32
August -- Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 6, Les Paul, 6, Ted Kennedy 23, Dominick Dunne, 17 (+10 hat trick bonus)
September -- Mary Travers, 28, Susan Atkins, 78